Never Undone

I took this photo on a drive with my family. I was praying to see God, to feel Him and then I saw this in the sky and this scripture came to mind, "Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?" Thankful for a God who pursues us.[/caption]

"I waited patiently for the Lord; and He inclined to me, and heard my cry. He also brought me up out of a horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my steps." Psalms 40:1-2

Are you in a hard place? A season of your life where you wonder if anyone sees you {if they truly KNOW you} ... your friends, your family {even God} I know Christmas has come. A time of GREAT joy. But maybe that wasn't in your heart this year. Maybe you're stretched to the point of exhaustion.

I understand. I've been in that space of struggle and weariness the past four months. My migraines came to a crescendo, to the point life and all I loved faded to the background. I felt like I was only existing {and it crushed me}. After much prayer, tears, conversations with friends {more prayer, tears ...} I made the choice to step away from all commitments {even the really amazing ones, like my five year Bible study that has fed and nourished me}. I kept only the commitment of work and my family and let my social calendar and have-to's fall away. I had thoughts I would do a meaningful Bible study by myself, start a study in my home, something. But instead I spent my free time sleeping, battling a deep sadness {and reading all the daily devotions I subscribe to in my Inbox}.

And yet God, in His goodness, broke through to my heart through all those daily readings, including one that started with this scripture: The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms; He will thrust out the enemy from before you, and will say, "Destroy!" Deut 33:27

I began to pray this scripture as a prayer, trusting that all battles are The Lord's - physical, spiritual, medical, emotional. I began to claim God's power over my life, praying for refuge and rescue. And although I'm not migraine-free, I have experienced greater relief than I've had in 20 years. I've gone from having migraines 5-7 times a week to one every two weeks {give or take}.

I don't know why my present circumstances must always seem set to "difficult" but I trust God is all-powerful and my life is safe in His hands. I accept I've been called upon to suffer. Do I love it? "NO!" But I've committed my life to Christ and surrendered my heart and my will for God's perfect heart and His perfect will. And, I trust all who suffer will be rewarded for every pain and blessed for every tear. "Underneath will be the Everlasting Arms and within will be the deep assurance that all is well with our souls. Nothing can separate us from the love of God-not death, nor life, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature." AW Tozer

What was intended to tear you apart, God intends it to set you apart. You cannot be undone.

God is here. He KNOWS and SEES you. There's NEVER a moment when you're not on God's heart because He made you FROM His heart.

"If God has singled you out to be a special object of His grace you may expect Him to honor you with stricter discipline and greater suffering than less favored ones are called upon to endure. In my experience, God is not gentle when He's in the process of creating something new in us. If God sets out to make you an unusual Christian He is not likely to be as gentle as He is usually pictured by the popular teachers. A sculptor does not use a manicure set to reduce the rude, unshapely marble to a thing of beauty. The saw, the hammer and the chisel are cruel tools, but without them the rough stone must remain forever formless and unbeautiful. To do His supreme work of grace within you He will take from your heart everything you love most. Everything you trust in will go from you. Piles of ashes will lie where your most precious treasures used to be." Tozer

No matter how much we struggle, God holds our soul {and His hold never loosens}. May you feel His pursuit and His GREAT love. This song by Laura Story is my current obsession - He Will Not Let Go {may it be a balm for your soul.}