Love Slumbers Not

Today, I celebrate the miracle of marriage with my main-man, Scott. Our love story is a miracle and mirrors so vividly the story of Ruth. I'm currently leading a women's small group study on Ruth and journeying through her story has caused my heart to ponder and remember the story God wrote behind the scenes of my brokenness. A story only He could write. I praise God for His character, which never changes. Despite our whims and mortal flailing {and failing} God remains FOR us. This is us.

Sixteen years ago, I was in the midst of a broken marriage. I was a single mother of a newly three-year-old little boy. God had shown His favor and led me to a job that gave provision {and He provided SO many miracles during that time}. He was a true husband, provider and father to myself and my son. In the very midst of all this chaos and mess, my mother spoke a prayer - a tiny mustard-seed prayer - that grew out of her heart, into God's heart, and into my story.

My desire was to remain single for life. I couldn't vision myself as a wife ever again. There was too much pain and vulnerability in marriage. But my mother, desiring I not be alone, urged me to open my heart. I didn't know any man - nor was I interested in dating. I was a mom and that was my most important focus. But my mom persisted with this: "What about that guy in your band. Scott?"

I met Scott in 2000 when I answered an Atlanta Journal Constitution (AJC) ad for musicians looking to collaborate with singers/artists. I answered that ad. And that's when I met Scott. That first day we met we wrote and recorded a song. He suggested we form a band and we did. Every Saturday myself and my 2-year-old, Noah, would go to Scott's house he shared with three other guys, and rehearse. We started to get regular gigs and it was great to be back in the music scene. It fulfilled a part of my heart I'd put on hold for so many years. And Scott was the first musician who seemed to always know the song of my heart. His style of music mirrored and complimented mine.

Then September 10, 2001 happened - the day of my divorce. In the weeks that followed my parents came to my apartment with replacement items for the items that were moved out - part of the brokenness. And Scott was there to help install and move everything in. They were captivated by him. But I only saw a good man - a good friend.

Then came my mother's prayer - to consider Scott.

And on January 1, 2002, in the midst of band practice, my heart began to open. Scott stopped practice to call his parents, grandparents, sister and every friend he's ever had - to wish them a Happy New Year. Here was this 27-year-old man who was such a faithful son, grandson, brother and friend. I had been interviewing all his friends and everyone gave the same testimony to his character: "There's no truer friend than Scott. He is loyal to the end." He was a Boaz.

Although I was seemingly on my own, with no one to care for me, Scott appeared, just like Boaz in Ruth 2. The name “Boaz” can be translated to mean “strength,” or “a worthy man.” In 1 Kings 7:21, one of the pillars that holds up Solomon’s temple was called “Boaz.” What a STRONG name for a STRONG, manly-man of God! #swoon

Like Ruth, I was tending to my home and working to provide for my family. I was happy serving God and my little family. Ruth shows that, as Christian women, we may feel alone in this world and completely helpless, but God has our backs. And in Ruth’s case, this choice of hers to work to better her life allowed God’s hands to work as well. As the Bible so tongue-in-cheek tells us, the field she "just so happened" to work in belonged to Boaz.

Like Ruth, I "just-so-happened" to see that ad. I "just-so-happened" to meet Scott. The little “coincidences” in my life go on and on - all evidence God was at work!

And like Boaz, Scott noticed me. In my brokenness he was a friend and he prayed for me. And on January 1, 2002, he revealed his heart to me and declared his love. Sitting on the couch, listening to Radiohead's newest album, he got closer and closer, fingers touched, all the feelings were being felt. I said: "What are you doing?" And he said: "I'm falling in love with you."

SAY WHAT!!!!

Even though I was feeling all the same feelings, I tried to spare Scott. I pointed out I was divorced, had a child - {AND a disability}. He was young, strong, able and free. Why burden himself with me? But Scott, like Boaz, had a different perspective of me and my situation. He said: "When I'm with you, I see light. My grandmother always told me I had a light in me. But that light went dim several years ago and I've been in a dark place. But when I met you, I saw your light and it made my light come back. You're strong and gentle. And you're a great mom. Seeing you with Noah makes me love you more. You're who I want."

In my heart, I knew this was the man my parents desired for me. All my friends loved him. All his friends loved him. He was a strong, worthy man. A rock, a shelter, my gift from God. Like Boaz, Scott had been praying provision and love for me - and he turned out to be the answer to his own prayer. He was the answer to my mother's prayer. He was the answer to a prayer I didn't even know I was praying - for God to change my heart, focus my heart on Him and serving Him, being more loving, being more faithful. And in so praying, God was guiding my heart and Scott's toward one another. My mother's heart desire aligned with God's heart desire and became my own heart desire.

Scott and I dated for a few months. By spring we were engaged. And, on October 6, 2002, before a company of family, friends and the Holy Spirit, we were wed. It's a story only God could write, and He writes the very best stories.

Scott is the best husband, probably in the whole world. At least he's the best husband in my whole world. He IS strong - a provider, support and shelter. He is a ROCK and God is OUR God. We aren't perfect. We're two flawed humans who have laid down our life before God and said: "We are yours. Help us serve YOU and bring YOU glory. Help us to be broken. Help us to be humble. Help us to have one another's hearts and best interests at the forefront of our mind."

The journey has had joys and heartaches, but the joys vastly outweigh any heartache we could suffer in this world. We know WHO we belong to and the promises God has made to those who serve Him faithfully.

To my Scott, in all the world, there is no heart for me like yours. In all the world, there is no love for you like mine. Happy 15th Anniversary to my heart. I do, always. I love you, always - every day my love grows. You are the best man, husband and father. You endure, strive, serve and love with all that you are and it humbles me. I'm so grateful love never slumbers. God's love endures forever. And my love for you - a gift from our sweet God - endures forever.

{this was on the back of our wedding program and I feel it, lived out every moment of our day in our home and marriage}

Love feels no burden, thinks nothing of trouble, attempts what is above its strength, pleads no excuse of impossibility … It is therefore able to undertake all things and warrants them to take effect, where he who does not love would faint and lie down. Love is watchful and sleeping, slumbereth not. Though weary, it is not tired; though pressed, it is not straitened; though alarmed, it is not confounded.

I love you. Always.